Welcome Guest. Please Login or Register. Dec 15, 2009, 8:41am
It is the year 1978, and the students of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry step out into a world darkened by the war. The lines that once formed the barriers between the houses are falling, to be replaced with ones of their own creation; Death Eaters, the loyal servant of the Dark Lord Voldemort; the Order of the Phoenix, dedicated to bringing down the evil by any means possible; and those who struggle to remain Neutral, forever caught between the two extremes. Trust is an illusion, when you can never truly know who is your ally, and who is only waiting for the perfect moment to stab you in the back.
With less then a year until the Last Night, which side will you choose?
~December, 1978~
Hestia Elizabeth Rose Jones
19 years ~~~ December 9th
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Credit goes to Dani & Britt.
Take without permission and their armies of metally unstable muses will hunt you down!
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Maybe that's the way I should go, Straight into the mouth of the unknown.
Joined: Jun 2008 Gender: Female Posts: 525 Karma: 1
I Owe Every Breath to You (Evan/Angelica) « Thread Started on Sept 5, 2009, 7:22pm »
It was one of those rare, beautiful early autumn days in London. Back home in Canterbury, it had been raining buckets all day, so the sunshine on the grey cobblestones in Diagon Alley seemed to call her name. Not that she didn’t have ample excuse anyway- it seemed that as soon as the morning sickness that had plagued her the last few months had passed, it coincided with the fact that the great majority of her clothing suddenly seemed too small to fit over her rapidly expanding middle. Angelica rested a hand over the swell in her stomach, a small smile playing on her lips as she walked out of the stop with a bag looped over her arm.
”Yes yes, I know it’s too warm- give me a minute..” She murmured under her breath, balancing the bag and her purse as she shrugged her heavy outer robes off and draped them over her arm as well. That was the other new development; and one that she was simply dying to share with the love of her life. The small but insistent feeling of their unborn child contently kicking away at the inside of her stomach. The first of so many firsts that Rodolphus was missing; locked away in Wiltshire, playing husband to a woman that he didn’t love. But it was September, and Angelica held tight to the knowledge that Bellatrix was back at Hogwarts, and soon enough (that night, if she was very lucky!) she would be able to see him much more often.
Such a far cry from the woman she had been a year ago… The carefully styled black hair now simply pulled back from her face, the dark green sweater clearly filled out by curves she had certainly never had before! But more then anything, it was the calmness. Perhaps a calm that was forever touched by grief, but a far cry from the taut and strained numbness that had been her protection for so much of her life. That train of thought was abruptly derailed as the aroma of cinnamon seemed to waft out of a nearby bakery. Wrinkling up her nose, Angelica wove her way across the street- why was it that everything seemed to smell so much stronger these days?! As much as her Healer swore it was normal, the young woman was certain she was going to be driven batty by it before the baby was actually born.
Which brought her around full circle for her reason for being in the city in the first place. Every month, regular as clockwork, to see the Healer and make sure that everything was still progressing normally. Quite possibly the only normal thing in her life these days! She was just passing by Flourish and Blotts when a large crowd seemed to choose that moment to flood out the doors. Ducking neatly around two rather large gentlemen (if the pair, in Quidditch jerseys and ball caps could be called that,) the rather diminuitive witch didn’t realize that someone- an unfortunately familiar someone- had also chosen the same path.
Evan Rosier Death Eater I torment the frail member is offline
just take my hand, let's fly away. i promise i'll be there everyday.
Joined: Jul 2008 Gender: Male Posts: 224 Karma: 0
Re: I Owe Every Breath to You (Evan/Angelica) « Reply #1 on Sept 19, 2009, 10:16pm »
It was a beautiful day- and Evan hated it. The sun was out and shining, and people were reveling in it, soaking up the last rays of sunshine before the cold came. Evan much preferred the colder weather. He had grown up in Rosier Estate, which, curiously, was always chilled. And between living there and under the Black Lake back at Hogwarts, the dark-haired man learned to favor the chillier seasons. On a day like this he would have happily stayed in Wiltshire, holed up in his study- he even would have preferred to be at work in the Ministry. But no- he got off work early today, and was then summoned to his mother. Aurelia knew just how to be cruel to her son, and sent him to Diagon Alley to pick up a few things. Later that evening he was to join her for dinner with a few guests: his dear Uncle Renault, his fiancé Glorianna, and her parents. The items he was sent out to retrieve? Flowers and a few fine pieces of jewelry for his beloved wife-to-be. Needless to say he was not thrilled. What a blow to his ego to be seen in such stores! It was at times like these that Evan liked to insist his mother had indeed been more horrible than her husband- but who could he complain to now? Evan had never felt more alone in his world. Angelica was gone- the muscles in his jaw tightened just barely scratching the surface of those thoughts. Rodolphus was hardly around anymore… he was always off, always had some excuse to go somewhere. Evan never asked him where he went, simply because it brought memories back to him of his own lies and excuses to go and see Matilda in secret. Yes- the Death Eater was slowly slipping away from everyone he cared for, to be replaced by Glorianna. He clung to the last time he saw his old girlfriend- thoughts of her helping to soothe him when he was wired.
Evan passed by a shop and spared a glance for his reflection. Despite the heat he wore a long richly black traveling cloak and black boots over pants and a light green, long-sleeved shirt. His skin was still pale, his black eyes still as lifeless as ever. There was no expression on his face at all- not even his annoyance could be detected. He seemed older, somehow. His hair had grown out a little, the infuriating curls falling into his eyes. There weren’t many people in his path- it was unwise to be out when so many people were disappearing. Evan, of course, had nothing to worry about- he wasn’t a target of the Dark Lord’s, but rather one of his arrows. There were hard lines to his face, and he seemed perhaps colder than he ever had before. Steps that were once arrogant and demanding the attention of others were now quiet, and there were new scars and bruises visible on every part of his exposed skin. People avoided looking at him. In his hand was a large bag containing a dozen red roses and a few expensive bits of jewelry- ones that he hardly looked at when he chose to buy them. Evan Rosier would be damned to be seen carrying such things without the bag to hide them from view! He was just passing by Flourish and Blotts when the doors opened and a throng of people burst out into the cobbled street. Evan swiftly ducked out of the way of two idiot men that most likely would have bowled him over if he hadn’t moved, but his effort to not be hit was wasted after all. He looked down at Angelica as they ran into each other, and without thinking, his free hand reached automatically for her arm to steady her. But just inches from touching her, he froze. His hand recoiled, dropping like a dead weight at his side. If he was shocked, nothing in his expression gave him away. Everything had suddenly gone very quiet and still. She looked different too, he noticed absently. It was only when someone else bumped him that his surroundings came back into focus, the sound returning to his ears. Without a word he allowed himself to be swallowed by the crowd, effectively disappearing from view- and then vanished down a side alley. It was quieter here. He walked into the darkness, the sun mercifully blocked out of this small space by the two towering buildings. He only just realized his heart had seemed to stop beating, and he took a long, slow breath, the bag dangling uselessly in his hand as he leaned against the stone wall. A small part of him regretted walking away… but he had no right to her life now. Just as he was about to push himself off the wall and return to Wiltshire, where he belonged, he heard the footsteps. He didn’t need to look to know she had followed him there- he could easily feel her presence.
Maybe that's the way I should go, Straight into the mouth of the unknown.
Joined: Jun 2008 Gender: Female Posts: 525 Karma: 1
Re: I Owe Every Breath to You (Evan/Angelica) « Reply #2 on Sept 20, 2009, 8:40am »
Her feet were moving before she had even given them permission to. Before the shock of seeing her brother had even registered in her conscious mind, she was ducking through what remained of the crowd, her heart beating painfully in her chest, echoing in her ears and drowning out the sounds of all around her. After months of missing him, months of praying that he was alright, she knew she wouldn’t be brave enough, strong enough- anything enough- to turn away and simply continue walking. Like holding her breath, eventually her body would force her to breathe; Evan was like air in her life.
Don’t turn me away, don’t turn me away, don’t turn me away.. She prayed frantically in her mind, a mantra, as her black eyes scanned through the people lining the sunlit streets, desperately searching for a man with dark hair. Not now- don’t you dare have run away that fast! Please Evan, please Gods, where is he?
The darkened shadows of the alley were little more then a sidenote- recessed between two of the walls, too small to be of any use, and overlooked completely on this lovely autumn day. But she didn’t feel the warmth anymore, each step only increasing the chill that seemed to coat her skin like a film. She wasn’t supposed to do this- wasn’t supposed to still need him after all of this time! But she did, and the last few months had only convinced her, beyond any reasoning to the contrary, that she was always going to need him. And pride be damned, if he was stronger then she was- if it meant swallowing every ounce of the damnable emotion, if it meant begging him to speak with her for just one minute… She didn’t care anymore. Because it would still be easier then living the rest of her life knowing that she hadn’t tried.
The shadows fell around her as she slipped into the alley. Comforting darkness, always darkness- from hiding in their rooms in the dead of night, to the tomb like silence of the Slytherin dorms after their estrangement. But she loved him still! No matter what he had done, no matter that shew as supposed to hate him forever, she had never been able to. Not when it was his words, his actions, that had betrayed her to their father; he was dead now! And she wouldn’t let him defeat them now… Angelica had thought she was brave enough to simply continue her life without him. They wouldn’t be the first siblings to part ways… But they weren’t like other brothers and sisters. They never had been.
”Evan?” Her voice was thick, cracked with emotion as she looked across the shadows at her big brother. One hand rested protectively over the curve of her stomach; subconsciously trying to shield her unborn child from the pain that seeing him again caused to flare like agony in her heart. As if she could… ”I know I’m not supposed to talk to you, but please… Please don’t ask me to leave… I’ve missed you so much…” Her black eyes were wholly truthful as she gazed up at him, slowly walking closer- her small feet moving across the gritty cobblestones without a conscious desire to do so.
Yes, he looked different. And yes, things between them had changed forever- but he was still her brother. And it didn’t matter, damnit, that he had taken the Dark Mark- that much she knew- but for Gods sakes, the man she loved, the father of her child, was one as well. And her perception on that had changed greatly since her days at Hogwarts. Rodolphus had promised to tell Evan about the baby… About them… And Angelica had never asked him what had happened when he did. Because she avoiding mention of Evan, though he was a constant in her mind. Even the sound of his name caused pain to bloom through her mind…
And so it was, that she had no way to know, that Rod had never breathed a word.
Evan Rosier Death Eater I torment the frail member is offline
just take my hand, let's fly away. i promise i'll be there everyday.
Joined: Jul 2008 Gender: Male Posts: 224 Karma: 0
Re: I Owe Every Breath to You (Evan/Angelica) « Reply #3 on Sept 26, 2009, 2:47pm »
Evan was consciously aware of Angelica’s presence before he heard her approach. He was actually surprised he hadn’t been able to detect her before they bumped one another. It didn’t matter how much time had passed since he last saw her- the Rosier siblings always- always- knew when they were close. It was a silent comfort to them, especially when they were children. Evan had known he could take the pain of their father’s annoyance as long as he felt her there with him- hiding in a closet or under the bed, it didn’t matter. The promise of her comfort after Cassius would have his fun and leave was like a thin, invisible shield. His body would be in pain- nothing she could do could stop that from happening- but after the first shock of it Evan had always viewed the pain as if it wasn’t happening to him, in a detached sort of way- but it always came back to him when he woke up in his sister’s cradling arms and her pleading tone, begging him not to give up, to come back to her and to Rodolphus. Cassius often left him in that peaceful darkness, not alive but not quite dead yet. When his sister’s frightened voice would crack into his rest, Evan knew he would be returning to the unbearable pain- but he came back anyway, because he knew he was needed. He couldn’t just abandon his loved ones. The alley provided the perfect cover for the Rosiers. It wasn’t used for anything- it was simply deserted. Always too dark, especially when compared with the bright, open spaces around it. An easy shortcut to the next street over, but nobody dared to venture inside it. The open streets meant safety for all those who gathered the courage to leave their beds- hardly anyone in their right mind would trade that secure feeling for one of unease.
Evan closed his eyes, counting the seconds down in perfect silence until she would be close to enough to touch. He didn’t know why he didn’t just Apparate- it would take less than a second to be back home, back to the charade he passed off for a life. Aurelia would be expecting him back any time now, ready to explain to him how he damned well better not ruin this evening with the Yaxleys and with Renault. Renault he thought he could bear- since Cassius’ death, the man had seemed even more empty than usual. How ironic that this man that he despised would be the only thing keeping him sane through the evening. Evan would spend his entire evening talking to his uncle… and with any luck he won’t be driven to kill himself by the end of the night! The Death Eater opened his eyes and turned, slowly, to face Angelica as she called his name. Of course he couldn’t just leave- he had spent the last few months hoping for a glimpse of his sister, of any whisper of her name, to make sure she was indeed benefiting from being disowned- but no. Angelica Rosier didn’t exist in Evan’s society anymore, so he wouldn’t hear a single thing. It was simple chance that brought them together now. He listened to her please, his expression carefully distant- but his black eyes were alive. He drank in everything about her. She certainly looked much better than she ever had- her hard mask was gone, and her tone was raw with emotion. His eyes came to rest on her stomach, drawn there by her hand- but held there by the obvious bulge to it. “Ask you to leave?” he echoed her words hollowly. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but I rather thought you no longer answered to the orders of others.” Angelica was pregnant. There was no other explanation for what he was seeing. A sick feeling washed over him then. His little sister was going to have a child… and he could only assume it belonged to Ian Belmont. For how could he know that the child was actually Rodolphus’? The brothers never spoke a single word about Angelica since the day she had been disowned. Evan was ignorant to the fact that, behind his back, his best friend had ignored the rules and regularly saw her- that they had fallen in love with each other- and that now she was carrying his child.
Maybe that's the way I should go, Straight into the mouth of the unknown.
Joined: Jun 2008 Gender: Female Posts: 525 Karma: 1
Re: I Owe Every Breath to You (Evan/Angelica) « Reply #4 on Sept 27, 2009, 8:17am »
”If you ordered me to go, then we’d have problems.” She admitted quietly, her back gaze drawn up to the clear stretch of brilliant blue, cloudless sky- a strip of colour that seemed to far away from their dim and shadowy hiding place. Just to stop the tears from stinging in her eyes; for a moment, it was too painful to look at him. ”But if you ask me? You know I wouldn’t fight you.” Shadows and gloom, what a fitting setting for them; it wasn’t beautiful, it wasn’t fair; but it was real. Like so much of their lives together, it was too raw to be glazed over with pretty words- lace and ribbons made unfitting frames for memories of screaming.
Perhaps she had erred. In dreaming of a future; not of some idyllic and peaceful perfection… Just freedom. More then once, Angelica had wondered if the most damning thing she had ever done in her life was allowing her brother to let her go. For her own health, for her own safety- he had done it out of love- but why had she left? Selfishness, desperation, the hope that just maybe, if she showed him the way, he would find the courage to follow?
But she had fought. Every day, even during the long years when they had barely civilly spoken. When she had wondered if the bond between her only sibling and herself had been shattered. And then the holidays. Returning home to find that it wasn’t gone at all- only hidden beneath the layers of the people they were pretending to be. Deep in her heart, Angelica held fast to a memory; of that single, perfectly joyous moment when they had believed they were free. Unwilling to let it become tainted by what had happened after; because as long as she could cling to it, as long as it still shone in the darkest, most doubting moments, she could carry on. She could leave him to his life…
No.
It hadn’t been so long that she couldn’t read him- and the ill flash through his black eyes was only too easy to understand. Slowly her thumb smoothed a tiny crease from her sweater, drawing her gaze don to his face. ”Don’t look at me like that, Evan- please. I knew- I know- you don’t like it, but don’t look at me like I’m diseased.” It was horribly unfair, he knew she was… Angelica’s mind didn’t need to follow that thought through to it’s conclusion. Slowly she shook her dark head, distractedly crossing the space between them. ”You didn’t know?” Troubled confusion colouring her expression – why hadn’t Rodolphus told him, as he had promised?
Her small, free hand hovered for a moment in midair, before her fingers rested hesitantly just above his elbow. The thick material was soft under her touch, nothing but the best for the head of the Rosier family. The errant thought was pushed to the back of her mind- no, he might be that in title alone, but he was still her brother. But she was close enough to look up at him, the shadows that cast faint streaks across their faces, no longer able to actually obscure her view of the man her brother had become.
Lifting her hand once more, she softly brushed the longer hair from his eyes; a bravely sad little smile crossing her lips. ”Stupid curls… How can you even see?” Her quiet voice trembled, little more then a murmur; shivering the silence in the alley, instead of shattering it. If he was going to ask her to leave, he would have done it already.. She had to believe that. ”We can’t talk here, Evan… Please, come with me? I know I shouldn’t ask- and I know you shouldn’t say yes- but please? What they don’t know can’t hurt them; and I don’t want to give you up yet.”
Evan Rosier Death Eater I torment the frail member is offline
just take my hand, let's fly away. i promise i'll be there everyday.
Joined: Jul 2008 Gender: Male Posts: 224 Karma: 0
Re: I Owe Every Breath to You (Evan/Angelica) « Reply #5 on Oct 10, 2009, 7:26pm »
“Perhaps it would be best if you would fight me,” Evan replied in the same quiet tone she was using, meeting her gaze. Angelica was no longer bound by the Pureblood society- she was free to live her life the way she wanted to. Evan should tell her to leave right that moment, because it would be expected of him. But if she would listen, if she turned and walked away… that was her own choice, driven not by what other people wanted her to do, but her own thoughts and feelings. Freedom… the very thing Evan had always wanted- and the moment it was within his sights, the very second it became a real possibility rather than a mere wish- he had backed out. Evan had been afraid. There was no denying the raw hatred he felt toward Cassius- he had wanted him dead every day until he finally received what he had been asking for. But a tiny, almost nonexistent part of him only wanted his father’s approval. The dark-haired man tried his very best to please the older man. There had been a time in his life when it seemed Cassius had succeeded in turning Evan into the perfect son. He and Angelica didn’t talk much for several years, and when they did, it was never pleasant. Cassius had been positive he had his son under his control… but he had severely cut into those ties over the last holiday break. The Rosier siblings, faced with the reality of their lives, came back together. Cassius unintentionally gave them reason to be back in each other’s lives. Then, when news reached the siblings of their father’s death… momentary bliss. In a single moment, Evan had thought he was free. He dared to believe his life was finally in his own hands. But he was wrong. He had to learn the hard way not to underestimate his father. Only three people understood the real reason behind Angelica’s disownment. Faced with the decision, Evan had acted with her best interests at heart. There was no chance in Hell he would see her married to Antonin Dolohov- Cassius’ own cruel choice. The dark-haired man wanted his sister’s happiness… and at the time, she told him she was in love with Ian. What other choice did he have? Of course he disowned her- he handed her the freedom she deserved on a silver platter, gave her the chance that he knew then he would never have. He could bear the pain of losing her in his life as long as he knew she understood why he did it, and that she was going to finally be happy. Looking at her now, he thought he made the right choice. She was going to be a mother- she was going to be married to a man she loved, if she wasn’t already. So why did he feel like something was wrong? Why did it seem he was missing some obvious fact? Something was off… but he couldn’t for the life of him understand what it was.
“Diseased?” he asked, arching an eyebrow. “I had thought the proper term was pregnant, Angelica. Am I incorrect?” Evan’s gaze swept the alley, roaming over both entrances- making absolute sure nobody was watching the curious interaction between the cloaked man and the pregnant woman. The last thing he needed was for someone to come investigate- someone to come to Angelica’s rescue. Especially if that someone was familiar with the Rosiers- and would not hesitate to inform Aurelia that her son was speaking to the woman in front of him. He then watched her close most of the distance between them, and he frowned at her next words. “Of course I didn’t know. We haven’t spoken in months, remember? Who else could have possibly informed me of this?” His confusion mirrored her own. Did she honestly believe he had been able to remain informed about the events in her life? Evan remained still as Angelica’s hand hesitated, then reached out for his arm. Again, the voice inside his head that sounded so much like Cassius hissed at him to leave immediately- but it didn’t hold much power over him, not at the moment. He brushed it off in mild agitation and looked down at his sister, his gaze never straying from her similar one as her hand moved from his arm to his hair- silently assuring her that, yes, she was allowed to touch him, whatever the consequence may be. “I can see just fine, as always, thank you,” he said quietly, the ghost of a smile reaching the surface. “Do you not remember I like my hair this way, because it drove-”Mother and father insane with rage, Evan finished silently, not necessarily wanting to mention them. Her request was greeted with a heavy silence. She shouldn’t have asked- and he shouldn’t say yes- but wasn’t he already tempting Fate? What was a few more hours of peace, knowing that eventually he would have to return to his damned life? “Go with you where?” he finally whispered after a long time, the indecision clear in his expression- the first real emotion he had shown her. His heart was beating irregularly now- Angelica, of all people, knew what his punishment would be if he agreed to go with her- the bag dangling from his arm a silent reminder of who he was and where he was supposed to be- but he couldn’t quite convince himself to end their time together… not yet, not so soon.
Maybe that's the way I should go, Straight into the mouth of the unknown.
Joined: Jun 2008 Gender: Female Posts: 525 Karma: 1
Re: I Owe Every Breath to You (Evan/Angelica) « Reply #6 on Oct 15, 2009, 1:31pm »
She had never loved Ian.
Though the school had seen it as the perfect Romeo and Juliet story- and he had held his tongue when she had called off their engagement suddenly, only days after her disownment. He was a good man, and she couldn’t deny that she had cared for him… But it had never been love; and from the beginning he had known that. It was a desperate bid for freedom, and he had loved her… Well, it was in the past now.
”Oh you’re such a comedian today, Evan.” She said dryly, a little scared at how easily he seemed to find his way back into her heart, even after so many months. The place that had been carved out for him alone, a little Evan-shaped hole in the fabric of her existence. Her lovely face twisted into confusion- a lump of ice seeming to settle in the pit of her stomach as she looked up at him, black gaze searching his eyes for some sign of… Deception? She didn’t have to look for that; lying to her was impossible; lying to him was just as pointless.
”You mean… Circe… Evan, Rod told me that he would tell you- months ago.” She couldn’t tell him herself, she hadn’t been able to speak to him! But Rod.. He had no excuse! A tiny flicker of agitation, trouble exasperation, began to thaw the ice; she would have a few very choice words for that man when she saw him again! The little yogic voice of virtue in the back of her mind piped up that he might have a very good excuse but… Evan was her brother! He had the right to know! ”If I knew… Fuck… Evan, I would have found a way to tell you.”
Pushing the anger to the back of her mind, Angelica’s slender fingers rested against his cheek for a moment, visibly trying to remind herself that this wasn’t a safe place- no matter that anywhere with him suddenly felt better then it had any right to. A wobbly little smile settling on her lips as she squeezed his arm, ”Il mio fratello- always causing trouble!” She managed a faint, tight laugh- but her next words were suddenly silenced by a sound just outside the alley that they had taken refuge in.
A familiar, Gods, so familiar voice- cultured and arrogant, with smooth consonants that seemed to blend into one another. “I know your Glorianna will prove to be a most advantageous match for my son. What a pity I had only one child- they do grow up so fast.” Angelica’s gaze flicked to the bright band of light that was the end of the shadowed recess, her eyes turning as hard and black as ships of obsidian. But there was no time to consider, the steps growing closer, with every beat, with ever second, carrying them closer to being discovered. ”You’re just going to have to trust me, Evan.” She whispered under her breath. The lurch of Apparation tore them from the alley, like being forcibly squeezed through a tube of toothpaste. Made incorporeal as they vanished through the air, and landed (if it could be called landing- it was m ore like having every molecule in your body suddenly compressed into a single shape once more,) it a very different place indeed.
The little red brick house seemed homey and warm, the wide windows edged in white- a little beacon of security, even though the rain poured down around them. Grabbing his hand instinctively, Angelica pulled her brother under the overhang of the slanted roof, before they could get too wet. The lilac bushes that surrounded the house had lost much of their leaves in the Autumn chill, black stems looking prickly against the wet green grass. ”My home is your home, always. Welcome to Canterbury, big brother.”
Evan Rosier Death Eater I torment the frail member is offline
just take my hand, let's fly away. i promise i'll be there everyday.
Joined: Jul 2008 Gender: Male Posts: 224 Karma: 0
Re: I Owe Every Breath to You (Evan/Angelica) « Reply #7 on Oct 16, 2009, 8:52pm »
Evan allowed her first comment to slide, simply because he didn’t desire a fight. The Rosiers were infamous for their sibling rivalry- he and Angelica proving it time and again with their seemingly endless fights. And even the generation of Rosier siblings before them- Cassius and their Aunt Druella- rarely uttered so much as a single syllable to each other unless absolutely necessary. Evan wasn’t sure what happened between them that tore them apart- assuming, of course, that they had ever been close. But no matter how completely furious Angelica had made him in the past, he always vowed to never let it get as bad as the two before them. He saw the odd look she was giving him, and wondered what on earth was going on. Evan knew too well she was looking for some sign of a lie- but what could he have lied about? “Rod?” he asked blankly. He did a quick mental scan… and only one “Rod” cropped up in his memories- Rodolphus. But that was impossibly laughable, of course! Rodolphus didn’t speak to Angelica. No, there was obviously some person that Angelica called “Rod” that wasn’t important enough for Evan to remember. “Well, whoever Rod is… he failed to tell me you were having Belmont’s child. Don’t be too angry with him. I’m sure the imbecile found every excuse he could not to contact me, hoping I found out from someone else instead.” Evan offered her a reassuring smile, letting her know he wasn’t upset with her. “Calm down, Angelica. At least now I know the truth… no harm done.” Her touch brought him a small comfort. He let out a breath as he reached to place his hand over hers. “Hush, sorella… Io non.”
His hand suddenly clamped down much tighter on hers as he lifted it from his face and turned his head, the momentary smile now gone. He stood perfectly still, hardly daring to breathe as he heard a sound that could bring him such misery without much effort- his mother, Aurelia. He didn’t know why she had decided to venture out to Diagon Alley when she should have been back at Rosier Estate, waiting to welcome Evan home. A simple charade- they would both smile as Evan bends to kiss his mother’s cheek, then continue to greet and exchange kisses and handshakes with the other men and women present. What the guests wouldn’t see is the annoyance and hatred Evan and Aurelia would be glaring into each other’s eyes! She was coming closer with every beat of his heart- they could have been linked. And when her footsteps stopped, when her sharp eyes would peer into the alley and see her son with the very daughter she claimed never existed… he was sure his heart would then stop beating, because Aurelia would have him massacred. Evan tore his gaze away from the entrance to the alley as Angelica spoke, and he offered her a tiny nod without hesitation. The unpleasant but familiar sensation of Apparition took him over, and they disappeared just as Aurelia became visible in the sliver of light with Glorianna’s mother. Gods… if she had glimpsed them, it was over. But then Evan’s black eyes were adjusting to a new place, and his curiosity pushed his future out of his mind. It was raining here, so he didn’t speak until Angelica took his hand and pulled him under a porch roof. “Canterbury?” he repeated quietly, taking a moment to look around. He had never set foot in this place. It seemed like a quiet neighborhood- the houses much smaller and closer together than he was used to seeing… but he didn’t mind. Evan picked up the feeling of welcome here- something he had never felt back in Wiltshire. “This is where you’ve been living, Angelica?” Evan asked, looking over at her. “I’m jealous,” he finished, and it was true. The house was another reminder that she was free, while Evan was still stuck at the same Hellish building he was forced to call home.
Maybe that's the way I should go, Straight into the mouth of the unknown.
Joined: Jun 2008 Gender: Female Posts: 525 Karma: 1
Re: I Owe Every Breath to You (Evan/Angelica) « Reply #8 on Oct 18, 2009, 10:38am »
Even Evan’s denial didn’t run that deep. Angelica had to swallow passed the sick feeling that stirred up at his words- that he couldn’t or wouldn’t, see the truth; how many people by that name did they really know? If anything, his reassuring smile made it worse- she had never imaged that she would have to be the one to tell him. To break the news that she had never stopped seeing his best friend; even when she hadn’t been able to contact him. Guilt settled heavily over her heart- wasn’t there more she could have done?
She hadn’t been able to stop his from making so many mistakes- and it didn’t matter that they were his mistakes to make, or that it was his life that he had to live. He was her brother, no matter what the legality said- and that meant, in her eyes, that his failure was more like her own. Even though she knew that it was misplaced responsibility- hadn’t that always been between them? He had been obligated to take her pain, and she hadn’t been obligated to do that same- and yet they had.
But she didn’t have time to spare more then a single moment to dwell on the memories- the sound of footsteps, the shadows that had begun to stretch across the entrance to the alley way, obscuring the light- how typical of their mother.
His mother.
Angelica’s fingers curled against her stomach protectively; Not my child. They will never know what it feels like to lose a parent. To feel unwanted or unloved. The warmth of his arm beneath her hand was reassuring; he was real, he was solid and blood and bone; and wasn’t some figment of her imagination. After the dizzying lurch of the apparition, she still held tightly to him- even after they were safely beneath the overhanging roof. Betraying how much she had missed him; how much she needed to know beyond doubt, that he wasn’t going to leave her. Because he wouldn’t- he was her brother; he was here…
”It was the best I could do with what I had saved away.” She explained, pushing the dark thoughts to the back of her mind. Her free hand fished in her purse for her keys, a small frown crossing her face in annoyance. ”Damnit… I need to clean this thing out.” Finally retrieving the little clinking bits of metal, and unlocking the door, and sparing him an almost self conscious smile. ”It isn’t much, but I’m trying to make it my own.”
The back door opened into the living room; warm crème walls and long green curtains, photographs on the wall that slowly waved and looked their way as they entered. Happy moments captured in film, and an old school trunk set in front of the white couch in place of a proper table. The house was warm, comfortable- a cozy little place, against the backdrop of the rain outside. ”Just leave your shoes on the mat.” She added, glancing back and plucking the bags from his arms, setting them in the corner and out of sight, before tossing her own casually onto the chair.
”And yes, you heard me right. My own. Evan, I left Ian only days after the last time we talked.” Moving over to the couch, Angelica tucked her feet up beside her, twisting a little to get comfortable and tapping her fingers lightly against her stomach with a sigh. ”Come sit down, ok? Then I’ll explain everything.”
Evan Rosier Death Eater I torment the frail member is offline
just take my hand, let's fly away. i promise i'll be there everyday.
Joined: Jul 2008 Gender: Male Posts: 224 Karma: 0
Re: I Owe Every Breath to You (Evan/Angelica) « Reply #9 on Nov 8, 2009, 4:39am »
Evan did not miss the fact that his sister refused to let go of him until it was necessary for her to dig through her purse. He waited, not once showing any sign of impatience as she took a moment to look for her keys. It was the tiniest, most insignificant thing… but it still tore at his already damaged heart. Evan had never had keys- he never needed them. The protective wards around his estate always allowed him entrance without a fuss- there was no need to lock any doors when all guests were forced to wait outside the gates to be let in. Nothing about the place he grew up in- was still forced to live in to this day- felt like home. But standing there with Angelica, watching her fish out the key to her home… it was different. As if she had never lived on the same grounds as he did, having instead lived on her own all this time. He had thought their months apart wouldn’t have changed much… but, oh, was he wrong. “If you are content, then there is no reason for you to be ashamed,” he assured her quietly. Black eyes swept the room he stepped into, observing everything about her new life. Something was a little off… but before he could dwell too much on it, he was looking down at her and offering her a small nod of his head. Evan kicked off his expensive shoes and left them sprawled on the mat- a darkly amused smile stretching across his face, as he realized no elves would be bearing down on him to take them and set them neatly elsewhere. In silence he stood there, unsure what to do with himself. That feeling of unease was still in the back of his mind, and it made him uncomfortable. “Thank you,” he murmured, grateful when she took his bags and unceremoniously hid them from view without further comment- his earlier embarrassment and annoyance with his day’s shopping trip returning to the surface just long enough for him to wonder just how long he could stay where he was. What had his mother been doing in Diagon Alley- looking for him, because he was taking too long? And naturally she would have his soon-to-be mother-in-law by her side, probably after deciding that if he was going to procrastinate, they would go to him- and most likely force him to walk around with them as they did shopping of their own. Evan shuddered. He would not have survived that experience.
The Death Eater was brought out of his tortured assumptions as if he had been doused with ice-cold water. He stood frozen, his eyes following her movement as she made herself comfortable on her couch. As much as he wished he could deny it, he now understood that feeling of unease. There was no trace of Ian Belmont anywhere in sight. Everything, from the décor, to the personal belongings- everything was purely Angelica. But how could this be? “You left Ian, just days after,” he repeated too calmly, not questioning- confirming. His entire expression was set in a mask of calm, of almost perfect serenity as he absently obeyed her request and sat down, though he kept his distance from her. She knew him well enough to know that when he acted like this there were other, stronger emotions building under the surface. “Explain. Please,” he added, still perfectly in control. He was confused, and a little upset. She had told him she loved Ian- had agreed to marry him. When Cassius was killed, and the family was suddenly weighing down his shoulders- he had disowned her for her own good- for the sake of giving her a better life than he knew he would have. What had happened, then, that ended that? Basic brotherly instinct told him to be furious with Ian… but hadn’t she just said she was the one to walk away? Evan’s gaze bore into her, sitting too still, waiting for her to tell him what was going on. He had assumed all this time she was married to Ian- but now he realized he had no idea what she had been doing since that dark day that, at one point, had looked so promising- hopeful, even. She left Ian… and yet here she sat, pregnant. Evan was perplexed. Who in heaven’s name was the father of her child? Who dared to curse her with such a thing, if not Ian? And that’s exactly what it was in Evan’s eyes- a curse. It was never a secret that the elder Rosier detested children with every fiber of his being- refused to have any of his own. When asked why, he would go with simple answers: they whined, they cried, they were annoying. He would never admit out loud to anyone his absolute fear of turning out like Cassius had- but Rodolphus understood his unspoken worries, had always agreed wholeheartedly that he wouldn’t want children either. And so he waited to be told that he had been betrayed by his best friend- his brother.
Maybe that's the way I should go, Straight into the mouth of the unknown.
Joined: Jun 2008 Gender: Female Posts: 525 Karma: 1
Re: I Owe Every Breath to You (Evan/Angelica) « Reply #10 on Nov 12, 2009, 7:38pm »
Most people would assume that Evan’s silence was nothing more than the arrogance of the upper class. Labeling him with the haughty reserve that most of them adopted at a very young age- smug and supreme in their confidence, that they were the be all, and end all, of the world. And perhaps in some ways they would have been right- the bystanders, that is. But while every lie had a grain of truth, so did every truth have a bit of subterfuge buried within it. And every circumstance was nothing more than a series of events, seen through rose tinged and biased eyes.
Angelica knew better then to tar her only brother with such a brush.
And so she didn’t pry, and didn’t push at him to give her the answers to what he was thinking. Ignoring the quickened trip of her heart in her chest, and tried to patiently let Evan come around to his own conclusions. It wasn’t easy- and she hadn’t always managed to do it- but this was… Important. And his silence bought her precious moments to organize her own thoughts- to curse her lover a dozen times in the space of a moment for not telling him; and to try and phrase the impossible.
Her fingers kneaded and plucked at a crease in her sweater, twirling a loose thread until it tightened and coiled back in on itself. And in years past, she might have looked away from him. To search for answers in the weave of the carpet, or the texture on the ceiling. But now? Never… She didn’t dare to take her black eyes off him, for fear that when she looked back, he would be gone. ”Evan I…” She began falteringly, taking a deep breath to try and calm the feeling that everything was about to go wrong. Again. ”I honestly thought you knew. If not about the baby, then at least about Ian… Foolish, I suppose. I’ve wondered, and worried, about you every day- and never had the courage to find out how you were. If I had… Well, then we wouldn’t be sitting here having this conversation. I don’t know why I assumed that you were any braver.”
The dark haired woman shifted a little in her seat, free hand moving to fold over the curve of her stomach, and the suddenly restless seeming baby within it- reacting to its mother’s anxiety, even if it had no idea what the world outside was- much less what happened in it. ”A couple of days after…” There was no need to define what ‘after’ she was referring to, not between them. ”The night of the big storm, you remember? I was out on the Astronomy Tower… It was the first time I’d been out of my room since..” Perhaps a comment easily overlooked- but Angelica hated heights with a passion. Nearly failing Flying in their first year, and claiming that is she were meant to fly, then she’s be a bird animagus and not a cat!
”I ran into Rodolphus.” She said after a long pause. She couldn’t be sad, couldn’t feel much of anything through the white noise haze of anxiety. Instinctively reaching out and folding his hand between both of hers; not even consciously registering the action until after she had done it. ”Sorry!” Angelica dropped his hand as quickly as she had taken it, apologizing hurriedly. Threading her fingers tightly together in her lap, unable to swallow back the feeling that she had lost any right to reach out to him for the reassurance he had always provided…
”I know you’re probably going to get angry- and I don’t blame you for that. And tell me that it’s not real, because of everything that happened with Ian… But, I didn’t love him. I loved the idea of freedom that he offered. I knew that.. That the person I’d loved since- since what seems like forever-“ Angelica stumbled over her words; a fractured sentence punctuated by a shaky breath. Turning her black gaze down to her hands, too ashamed to look up at him. She hadn’t told him- he was her brother, and she had lied by omission. In her eyes, she had lost the right, and the guilt sat like a heavy weight between her shoulders. ”Would never feel the same way. But he did! I mean, he does… I didn’t find out I was pregnant until after; well, the day of; his wedding to Bellatrix. He couldn’t leave you- wouldn’t have left you alone…’
“I don’t pretend to know why he didn’t tell you. Maybe he was as scared as I am now. Because I already lost you once; I can’t, I can’t do it again. But I don’t want lies between us- not now. You’re my brother.. That makes you more important then just about anyone else in the whole world.” Her voice failing, trailing off into a vulnerable, almost childish murmur. Pressing her joined hands against her chin, like an unconscious prayer to a God she didn’t believe in, and never had.
”I’m sorry you had to find out like this. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you myself when I first found out. But most of all, I’m just sorry. For everything.”
Evan Rosier Death Eater I torment the frail member is offline
just take my hand, let's fly away. i promise i'll be there everyday.
Joined: Jul 2008 Gender: Male Posts: 224 Karma: 0
Re: I Owe Every Breath to You (Evan/Angelica) « Reply #11 on Nov 29, 2009, 9:45pm »
The silence that surrounded the siblings was tense and awkward. Neither dared to breathe a word while they both tried in desperation to pull their thoughts together. It had happened only rarely- both being known for their stubborn impatience. Angelica was better at being silent than Evan was, and she could only go through with it once in a great while. Evan’s mind wasn’t working like it normally did. His thoughts that often raced, shrewdly calculated, through his brain, were coming painfully slowly and making little sense to him. Was this shock, then? His mind was flat out refusing to come to the correct conclusion. It was impossible to even consider. Yet still his perfectly smooth mask faltered for a single moment in time as his heart responded to what his thoughts were trying to tune out. Black eyes stared expressionlessly into the familiar, similar black eyes of his sister- neither one brave enough to be the first to look away. It wasn’t for fear of her vanishing into thin air that Evan watched her so intently. He knew she would not- this was not one of his nightmares. It was real- almost painfully so. So real that it had the ability to destroy him. Could he really walk away from her now? To turn around after this day and return to Wiltshire, pretending it had never even happened? Was he strong enough to do that to himself? To her? He had spent his life doing all in his power to protect her from every conceivable type of harm… except himself. He had been convinced at the time that disowning her was for the best. She deserved freedom. Still he could not deny the pain it caused her, almost as if he dealt with it alongside her. Each time his eyes had so much as flickered in her direction during classes the rest of that year, it was like enduring torture- and he knew enough about that to be able to make an accurate comparison. Angelica started to speak, and Evan remained a silent sculpture as he listened, waited for her to continue and explain to him what he had been missing all this time. “How could I have known you were no longer with Ian? No such news ever reached my ears. All this time I thought you were with him, being happy and living the life you always wanted to live- freely, your own way.” Evan didn’t comment when she all but called him a coward. In the past such a thing would have sent him into a tantrum but now? It didn’t affect him. He knew perfectly well that he had not been brave enough to defy his family to check up on Angelica- that and he would have rather died than do anything that would force him to abandon Rodolphus. Evan continued to listen as she set the scene. The storm he remembered without much problem- it was one of the last nights he had snuck away to spend time with Matilda before he shattered both of their worlds for a life he despised. A light frown flashed across his otherwise lifeless face. The Astronomy Tower? No- he hadn’t heard her right. Angelica hated heights. He was on the verge of asking her what on earth she had been doing there when a memory hit him: Angelica standing out on her balcony at Rosier Estate. His sister, inches away from jumping from the great height to end her misery, and Evan, arriving to see her just in time to pull her back into his binding arms and stop her from leaving him. It was a selfish act. He honestly believed she would have been much happier dead- but because he couldn’t cope without her, he took away her chance at real happiness. “You were going to jump,” he said quietly, not as a question, before adding silently, and I wasn’t there to stop you.
But he was confused. If she had gone to the Tower, why was she sitting before him, alive and unharmed? She paused in her narrative, and he paused, too, holding his breath until she spoke again. Rodolphus. Yes- it all made sense now, everything clicked. The ill feelings inside him from not knowing eased. He could no longer deny what was true now that the words had been spoken aloud. Evan felt cold from the inside out. He wasn’t aware that Angelica had taken his hand until she dropped it and apologized. The dark-haired man didn’t know what expression was frozen on his face for the first time in a long time- not that he cared at this point. He didn’t say anything to her apology, just continued to stare at her until she confessed that she had never loved Ian- having loved Rodolphus instead. And Rodolphus- his brother- had loved her too. Betrayal slammed into him so suddenly that he almost winced. His chest tightened around his almost non-existent heart. Was he angry? No- he was feeling several emotions, but anger surprisingly wasn’t one of them. Evan wanted to speak, but he couldn’t even pry his lips apart to make the attempt. He was counting the days in his head. So they had been in love. For how long, he didn’t know. Knowing that he was going to be married soon, Rodolphus had impregnated Angelica. What had he been thinking? Evan didn’t have the energy to be angry at the moment, but he was sure that later, when the initial shock wore off, he would be feeling some sort of rage. The two people he trusted most in the world had lied to him- how many times? In how many ways? What else had been kept from him? Evan’s head was suddenly filled with doubt- and Cassius’ voice. For how many times had his Father insisted that his son couldn’t afford to rely on others? To trust was a terrible weakness, and if Evan were any kind of a man, he would count on only himself. Could it be… was it even possible… that Cassius may have been right all along? Evan opened his eyes when Angelica suggested that perhaps Rodolphus had been frightened of his friend’s reaction. Well- if that was true then it would be interesting to see how Rodolphus reacts to Evan the next time they see each other, when Evan will be feeling less than friendly. In his present state he may have scoffed at her words. Most important person in her life, indeed! But he silently judged her sincerity, and decided that it wasn’t she he should direct his emotions at. “I’m here, aren’t I? The fact that I haven’t walked out should put you at ease. Do not forget that I lost you once already as well. I’m not so masochistic that I would do that again so soon.” Evan hesitated for a long moment, and then reached out to take her joined hands in one of his; pulling her gently toward him so he could wrap his other arm around her waist. “Shut up, Ang, will you?” he muttered in response to her apologies- accepting them in the usual fashion of blowing them off. Hugging her after so long felt the same as it always did and yet different. They were both different people now- changing so dramatically in the few months spent apart. That they were both there meant they were willing to try to fit back into each others’ lives- but how well would it work out in the end?
Maybe that's the way I should go, Straight into the mouth of the unknown.
Joined: Jun 2008 Gender: Female Posts: 525 Karma: 1
Re: I Owe Every Breath to You (Evan/Angelica) « Reply #12 on Dec 1, 2009, 9:29am »
”Jump? No… Not exactly.” Oh but she remembered that night. The crushing weight that had felt like it was going to crush her alive. The wedding, the sense that her whole life was spiraling completely out of control, and there was nothing she was going to be able to do about it. Hopeless, and helpless, and suffocating, the walls closing in around her. Around them both. But he’d saved her- just like he always did. Even disowning her had been a final act of love for her, even though it had hurt them both terribly to do it. Because freedom; that elusive, intangible, and for a long time out of reach quality- had been the one thing he could still give her. But the cure had nearly destroyed her, and it was only though sheer luck that Rodolphus had ventured up that high before the winds had swept her to her death. I didn’t want to kill myself,’
“But I wanted it to end. To have the decision taken away from me, and just leave living or dying in the hands of luck.” Perhaps it wasn’t a very big distinction; either way, she would have fallen to her death. But to Angelica, it made all of the difference in the world, ”I wasn’t really actively courting death… Just inviting it if it wanted to come.” The dark haired woman took a slow, deep breath, looking down at her hands as she twisted a loose thread on her sweater until it began to fold back in on itself. ”Even if I knew you weren’t going to be there, I couldn’t give up like that. I knew if I’d jumped, then you would have blamed yourself- and I couldn’t do that to you. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I hadn’t slept in days, and I wasn’t thinking very clearly by that point.”
A complete understatement. Her head had been swimming with grief and exhaustion, and looking back on it now, it was difficult to remember much of anything save for the blur that the world had been passing as. Leaving her behind. A tiny, hesitant smile crossed her lips as she told her to shut up, pliantly letting him pull her into his arms. ”I know, I know. Be happy that you’re here, and don’t apologize.” And she was. In the months following graduation, Angelica had begun to see things more clearly, had been forced to stand on her own two feet without the comforting security of her brother’s constant, (if often combative,) presence. And perhaps she could do it- perhaps she had endured better then anyone would have guessed the little Pureblood capable of.
But at the end of the day, it had been her brother’s voice in the back of her mind telling her to stop feeling sorry for herself, and just do it. She rested her small hand against his chest, the reassuringly steady beat of his head beneath her fingers; a thin, barely audible laugh slipping from her lips- it wasn’t amusement, so much as a choice between laughing or crying; some expression for the myriad of emotions that had decided to ballroom dance around the inside of her mind. ”I think Rod was happier about the baby then I was…” She said after a long time, quietly under her breath. ”I was so scared- still am- of just ending up like Mother, or worse.” She didn’t need to define what ‘worse’ was- not to him. ”I just keep trying to remember what Auntie Rose was like, you know?”
Safe in the circle of her brother’s arms, Angelica felt some of the anxiety begin to fade. Yes, it was a little strange… But the year between sixth and seventh, the siblings had barely spoken- and it was not so much worse then it had been after that. And if they could get passed that, Angelica had to believe that they could get through this as well- at least they were willing to try. ”Nobody knows the baby is Rod’s- it’s just not safe, especially if it’s a boy.” The dark haired woman shuddered quietly at the thought; their mother would be only too willing to use the baby to her own ends, and the idea made her stomach twist uncomfortably.
Rubbing a hand over the firm curve of her middle, black gaze flicking down briefly, the edges of her mouth tugging upwards despite herself. ”But it’s healthy… And impatient. Takes after their father already, I think.” Lifting her hand from his chest, Angelica reached over and stole his hand lightly, shifting a little to press his fingers over the weave of her green sweater. The soft thumping feeling would only get stronger with the coming months, but it could still be felt without any difficulty. ”Rod hasn’t been by in a while, so you’re the first person to get to feel that.” She said quietly, her tiny smile softening as she rested her head against his shoulder comfortably. ”Uncle Evan… I didn’t ever really think I would say that.”
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